1 Timothy 3:8-13 - Deacons in the Church

Good to be with you tonight. If we have never met, my name is Brad. I’m the lead pastor here and one of the elders, and I am just delighted to share the Word with you. We will be in 1 Timothy chapter 3 in just a little bit.

Being a founding pastor here at The Well—we just celebrated twenty years—it has been a really interesting journey trying to keep up with what God was doing. In some ways, we kind of had a tiger by the tail as we launched this church. It started to grow, by God’s grace, very quickly. And because it grew, things began to change very quickly.

As a young leader, I started reading, asking, “Okay, what do I need to know? What do I need to look out for? What do I need to get ahead of? Where are the tension spots and change points?” I came across a concept called ceilings of complexity. It’s a business concept, but the idea is that most organizations—even churches—start out like a cross-country duo. It’s like two people with way too much time on their hands. They do everything together. They talk about everything together, and all the decisions are made together. That’s great! It’s super relational, it’s wonderful, and you love each other. But if the organization grows, the game changes.

When the game changes, your way of relating changes, the information flow changes, and your structure changes. If you are not prepared for the game to change, you hit tension.

It goes from a cross-country duo to a golf foursome. Have you ever played golf with a foursome? It’s like, “Hey, where’s my ball?” “I think it’s over there.” So we all walk over to my ball. “What do you think, seven-iron or eight-iron?” And they say, “What does it matter? You’re going to shank it anyway! But hit the eight-iron.” So I hit the eight-iron. “Hey, good shot, man!” There is still a shared experience among the four of you. Information is collectively shared.

Ceilings of Complexity and the Growing Church

At some point, the game changes again, and it becomes a basketball team. A basketball team is very different. Now you have a guy who is 7’5“ playing center who can’t dribble to save his life. You have a guy with good handles who can shoot, but he can’t play the low post. People have specialized positions. The coach calls out plays from the sidelines, and everybody hears, but there is now specialization happening that wasn’t there before. If you wish things were still like a cross-country duo, you’re in for a rude awakening because decisions are being made that you weren’t even told about.

Then the game changes yet again, and it becomes a football team. On a football team, you literally go to the stadium in different buses. When the offense is on the field, the defense is on the sideline. They are in different meetings, playing different positions, and speaking different languages. When the offense is playing, the defense is sitting down talking to their coaches with no thought of what is happening out there—other than, “Okay, we just had a fumble, so now we have to go out and play.” When the defense takes the field, the offensive guys sit down.

Not only that, the coaches aren’t even on the sidelines anymore; they are up in a booth. You have to trust that the guy up in the box sees something you don’t see, calls it out, and you execute, trusting that his perspective is accurate. The game changes. And if an organization is not ready for that change, it brings massive tension.

I share that because that wasn’t just our experience here at The Well; that is exactly what you see in the book of Acts. They wouldn’t have called it ceilings of complexity, but think about the progression: one man, Jesus, calls twelve disciples. In Acts chapter 1 and 2, those twelve grow to 120. In Acts 2:47, they grow to 3,000. In Acts chapter 4, they reach 5,000. In a matter of days, the movement went from a single leader to over 5,000 people. The game changed overnight. And because they weren’t fully prepared for the change, it brought tension.

The Birth of Diaconal Ministry

If you have your Bible, turn with me to Acts chapter 6. I want to show you this tension.

As the early church grew numerically, keep in mind that the gospel was also spreading geographically and ethnically—into Egypt, Syria, Turkey, Greece, Italy, and on its way to Spain. You had numeric growth, geographic expansion, and ethnic diversity all colliding at once.

Acts 6:1 (NASB)

Now at this time while the disciples were increasing [in number], a complaint arose on the part of the Hellenistic [Jews] against the [native] Hebrews, because their widows were being overlooked in the daily serving [of food].

There was a complaint between the Greek-speaking Hellenistic Jewish believers and the native Hebrew-speaking Jewish believers. Widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food. That is exactly what happens when ceilings of complexity shift and you aren’t prepared: conflict arises. Somebody feels left out, somebody’s preferences aren’t met, and tension boils over.

The Greek-speaking widows were being overlooked. I don’t think there was any malice behind it, but it was happening. So the apostles faced an important question: how do you solve the problem?

The easy, instinctive solution for a leader is to insert yourself into the middle of it. Some leaders who are gluttons for punishment insert themselves into every conflict regardless of how large the organization has grown. The problem with that is there is simply not enough of you to go around.

Notice the wisdom of the apostles in verse 2:

Acts 6:2-3 (NASB)

So the twelve summoned the congregation of the disciples and said, ’It is not desirable for us to neglect the word of God in order to serve tables. ’Therefore, brethren, select from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Spirit and of wisdom, whom we may put in charge of this task.

It wasn’t that the apostles were “above” serving tables. These men had been serving tables! But they recognized the unique nature of their calling. They had to devote themselves to prayer and the ministry of the Word. If they spent their time waiting on tables—a task others could do—then no one would shepherd through the Word and prayer, a task uniquely entrusted to them.

So they appointed seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom. Interestingly, all seven men selected had Greek names. The apostles essentially said, “We hear you. You understand the language and the culture—you lead this ministry.” That was brilliant leadership.

In verse 1, the conflict was over the daily serving of food. That word for “serving” is diakonia, which means to serve, help, or support. What you see emerging in Acts 6, even before the formal office is named, is the second leadership role in the local church: the deacon.

Elders and Deacons: Understanding the Biblical Blueprint

Last week, we talked about how a website functions because of the source code underneath it. We are looking at the source code of the local church. Last week, we examined the primary governing office: the elder. This week, we are looking at the complementary role: the deacon.

As churches continued to multiply, there was a need to establish healthy leadership structures. To be crystal clear: in any church, Jesus Christ is the ultimate authority. We defer to Him. The empowerment of the local church is the Holy Spirit living within us—not merely clever leadership models. You could navigate ceilings of complexity perfectly from a business standpoint and still have a spiritually dead church. Paul plants, Apollos waters, but God causes the growth.

On the human side of church leadership, the New Testament establishes the role of elder.

Acts 14:23 (NASB)

When they had appointed elders for them in every church, having prayed with fasting, they commended them to the Lord in whom they had believed.

Titus 1:5 (NASB)

For this reason I left you in Crete, that you would set in order what remains and appoint elders in every city as I directed you,

There was a clear command to appoint elders in every church. In smaller churches or rural areas, they may have had only elders. The office of deacon is specifically mentioned in larger, more complex church contexts, such as Ephesus, Philippi, and Rome.

Philippians 1:1 (NASB)

Paul and Timothy, bond-servants of Christ Jesus, To all the saints in Christ Jesus who are in Philippi, including the overseers and deacons:

Romans 16:1 (NASB)

I commend to you our sister Phoebe, who is a servant of the church which is at Cenchrea;

Biblically, elders can exist without deacons, but deacons do not function apart from elders. Elders govern and shepherd; deacons support, execute, and care for practical needs.

Last week, we saw that elders are biblically qualified men, appointed based on character, serving in plurality under the authority of Christ. Ladies, please hear this: appointing qualified men to the elder board is not a reflection of worth, value, intelligence, or gifting. Men and women are absolute equals in Christ. Rather, it is an expression of God’s design and order for the family and the church.

The Qualifications of a Deacon

With that foundation laid, let’s look at 1 Timothy chapter 3, beginning in verse 8.

1 Timothy 3:8-10 (NASB)

Deacons likewise [must be] men of dignity, not double-tongued, or addicted to much wine or fond of sordid gain, [but] holding to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience. These men must also first be tested; then let them serve as deacons if they are beyond reproach.

The word “deacon” comes from diakonos, meaning a servant or one who cares for practical needs. In Acts 6, these servants got their hands dirty in the day-to-day needs of the body. One scholar summarized the distinction beautifully: Elders carry out the ministry of the Word; deacons carry out the ministry of mercy.

Notice that deacons still carry significant character qualifications. They must be dignified—worthy of respect. They must not be “double-tongued,” meaning hypocritical or two-faced. If a deacon went from house to house caring for families, what he said in one home had to match what he said in the next. They must not be addicted to wine or fond of sordid gain—they couldn’t be greedy, especially since they were handling resources for the poor.

They had to hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience, meaning they embraced sound doctrine and lived it out with integrity. And they had to be tested over time. Godliness in a single moment proves very little; godliness proven over time means everything.

1 Timothy 3:12-13 (NASB)

Deacons must be husbands of [only] one wife, [and] good managers of [their] children and their own households. For those who have served well as deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.

Notice the differences between elders and deacons. Elders are required to be “able to teach”; deacons are not. Deacons must hold to the Word of God, but they are not required to herald the Word from a pulpit. Furthermore, elders are explicitly and exclusively men (1 Timothy 3:1–2). But when we look at deacons, the text opens up a fascinating discussion.

Who Are the Women in Verse 11? Four Views

In the middle of the qualifications for deacons, Paul writes verse 11.

1 Timothy 3:11 (NASB)

Women [must] likewise [be] dignified, not malicious gossips, but temperate, faithful in all things.

The Greek word used here for “women” is gyne, which can be translated as either “women” or “wives.” Because the Greek word carries both meanings, there has been extensive debate throughout church history. Even back at the Council of Nicaea in A.D. 325, leaders were discussing male and female deacons.

There are four primary views on how to understand verse 11:

1. All Christian women in general. This view suggests Paul is pausing to give general instructions to women. While every Christian woman should aspire to these virtues, it feels out of place contextually. Why would Paul give specific qualifications for elders, start listing qualifications for deacons, jump to general instructions for all women, and then jump right back to male deacons in verse 12?

2. The wives of deacons. This is a very common view, and many translations (like the ESV) translate the word as “their wives.” The idea is that because deacons serve in close, personal proximity to families, their wives must share their high character. However, it seems unusual that Paul would give character requirements for the wife of a deacon but give no requirements for the wife of an elder, who carries even greater spiritual authority.

3. A separate order of “deaconesses” or female assistants. This view suggests verse 11 refers to a distinct, subordinate group of female helpers. Yet the passage does not describe an entirely separate office; it uses the word “likewise,” connecting these women directly to the qualifications of the deacons.

4. Women serving fully in the functional office of deacon. This is the view that I find most compelling textually. Paul uses the word “likewise” in verse 8 for deacons, and again in verse 11 for women deacons. He outlines qualifications for male deacons, qualifications for female deacons, and wraps up with general promises for all who serve well.

Throughout the New Testament, women played vital, prominent roles in ministry. Think of Lydia, who hosted the church plant in Philippi; Priscilla, who alongside Aquila helped instruct Apollos; Chloe; Nympha; and the ten women commended by Paul in Romans 16.

Among them was Phoebe:

Romans 16:1-2 (NASB)

I commend to you our sister Phoebe, who is a servant of the church which is at Cenchrea; that you receive her in the Lord in a manner worthy of the saints, and that you help her in whatever matter she may have need of you; for she herself has also been a helper of many, and of myself as well.

Phoebe is explicitly called a diakonos of the church in Cenchreae, and she was the trusted courier who carried Paul’s theological masterpiece—the epistle to the Romans—to its destination.

Good and godly scholars land on different sides of this debate. But what is abundantly clear in verse 13 is that anyone—man or woman—who serves faithfully as a deacon gains a high standing and great confidence in the faith.

Where Do Pastors and Staff Fit In?

You might look at 1 Timothy 3 and ask, “I see elders and I see deacons, but where do pastors fit in?”

The English word pastor appears only once in most New Testament translations, in Ephesians 4:11.

Ephesians 4:11 (NASB)

And He gave some [as] apostles, and some [as] prophets, and some [as] evangelists, and some [as] pastors and teachers,

The term “pastor-teacher” describes a functional gifting to shepherd and feed God’s people. The word comes from poimen, meaning shepherd. In the New Testament, shepherding the flock is the responsibility of the elders.

Here at The Well, our elders oversee and shepherd the flock. Because our elders cannot handle every teaching and administrative duty themselves, they hire pastoral staff. Our pastors are biblically qualified men who handle the Word of God, teach our campuses, and shepherd the flock under the authority and direction of the elder board.

What about general staff? You won’t find a line item in the New Testament commanding a church to have an office staff. It is extra-biblical wisdom. We do not hire staff to do all the ministry for the church; we hire staff to equip the saints to do the work of the ministry.

Our general staff—composed of both godly men and godly women—function in the spirit and role of deacons. They serve practical needs, coordinate ministries, lead teams, and equip our congregation. If you are a community group leader, a coach, or a ministry facilitator, you are functioning in the vital role of a deacon.

The Church Is a Battleship, Not a Cruise Ship

The goal of elders, pastors, staff, and deacons is simple: to help you realize that you are God’s workmanship.

Ephesians 2:10 (NASB)

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them.

Too many churches operate like a spectator sporting event, where 50,000 people who desperately need exercise sit in the stands eating nachos, watching 22 people on the field who desperately need rest. That is not the biblical picture of the church!

The church is not a cruise ship; it is a battleship. A cruise ship exists to cater to your preferences, pamper your comfort, and serve your every whim. A battleship exists to accomplish a mission. We do not exist as a church to cater to your consumer preferences. We exist to equip you, train you, and deploy you into a broken world with the gospel of Jesus Christ.

When the church functions as a body—when leaders lead, teachers teach, encouragers encourage, givers give, and servants serve—it is a breathtaking thing. Nobody is sitting on the sidelines. We are all in the game together, helping people connect to God and to each other in every neighborhood.

A Call to Serve

So how do we apply this tonight?

First, to the men: I want to encourage you to set your sights on Christ. The standard for eldership is high, but it is a noble thing to aspire to. If God is stirring in your heart a desire to pursue eldership, our doors are open. Reach out to us. We would love to walk with you, mentor you, and create space for you to grow.

And if you don’t feel called to be an elder, aspire to be a deacon. Serve the body! Don’t let church be a spectator sport. I know you’re busy—everyone is busy. But Jesus said that if you try to cling to your life, you will lose it, but if you lose your life for His sake, you will find it. Real joy is found when you pour your life out for the kingdom of God.

Second, to the women: We invite you to step into leadership and service. Aside from the offices of elder and teaching pastor, the doors of ministry, leadership, and service at The Well are wide open to you. We honor, celebrate, and need the gifts, wisdom, and leadership that God has given to women in our church family.

Years ago, I came across a poem about what happens when God’s people catch a vision for His mission. It says:

A movement begins defying tradition, strangely sacred yet sacrilegious, without title or privilege, revolutionary. Out of obscurity into history, a movement begins. Against all odds, uniting reverence with relevance, unstoppable, questioning everything, and answering only to God.

As I look ahead at the future of The Well, my prayer is that a fresh movement of God would rise up among us—that we would reject cultural complacency and fully engage the mission of Jesus. The days ahead are not going to get easier, but the light shines brightest in the darkness.

Let’s pray together.

Father, thank You for the invitation to be part of the body of Christ. Thank You for every gift, every calling, and every opportunity to serve Your people through the work of deacons and servants. I pray for every man and woman here tonight. Stir our hearts. Free us from spectator Christianity. Ignite a fire within us to use our time, gifts, and energy to build Your church and proclaim Your gospel. May a movement of selfless service begin right here, right now. We pray this in the mighty name of Jesus. Amen.